Dinosaur

I am a dinosaur (Scriptasaurus) whose current habitat is the Blue Mountains, west of Sydney.

For many years I was a part of the dominant species within Adland. I roamed the world freely, picking up awards and accolades wherever I went. I was young, I was fierce, I was strong and there were none who could touch me.

But in the last ten years or so, the dominance of my species has been challenged by the emergence of a new breed. Younger, more agile mammals, with impressive South American or European heritage and extravagant facial hair.

These animals have driven all before them, and the mighty dinosaurs, once the undisputed kings of this advertising landscape have been driven to the very fringes of this brave new world. In my case, Hazelbrook.

In the face of this competition, we have had to adapt our diets or face extinction. No longer do we dine on Cannes-winning opportunities and multi-million-dollar t.v budgets. Instead, we feed where we can on paltry copywriting jobs, edms, webpages and blogs, and pretty much anything we can get our paws on.

And make no mistake, competition is fierce for these tiny offerings. it is not uncommon to see 20 or more of these once-mighty beasts fighting to the death over a Christmas card rewrite or small content writing job.

It is all most dispiriting.

But as I sit here, chomping moodily on my latest brochure and contemplating the fiery orb of my own extinction hurtling towards me, I have decided to make one last stand.

Yes, before advancing age consigns me to the dusty pages of Adland history, I have determined to give it one last go. I have thrown myself into the bewildering world of social media, and have mastered, (well partially mastered is perhaps more apposite) the intricacies of Facebook ads, SEO, E-commerce, funnels, lead generation and the like. I have dusted off my book, refreshed my resume, and adopted a new positive outlook on the insistence of my mate. (One of the younger, more adaptable breeds.)

To put it in a nutshell, I have evolved.

Will this evolution be enough to ensure the continuation of my species? Is it a case of too little too late? Will I be forced to eke out my remaining days as a proof-reader?

That very much depends on people such as your good self who are reading this article.

It is too much, perhaps, to ask you to give a prehistoric reptile such as myself a full-time job. But perhaps you could find it within yourself to throw me a mammoth bone in the form of some freelance work.

If I must be a dinosaur, and it appears that I must, then at least let it be a Velociraptor. You know, the ones from Jurassic Park with the adaptive eyesight, increased nimbleness and adroit, problem-solving brain. The dinosaur that looked set to challenge the dominance of mammals before the meteor decreed otherwise.

So, if you would like the opportunity to work with one of these glorious beasts up close and personal, you can fax me or get my pager on….. (just kidding)

You can email me or call me on my mobile. Yes, I have one of those.

Or alternatively, you can wait a few years and then see my bones in the Natural History Museum when you next go to London.

My future is in your hands.